By Dr. Michael Ford
Most of us think we’re good listeners. But if we’re honest, we often listen just long enough to respond — not to understand. We hear just enough to prepare our rebuttal, to offer our advice, or to shift the conversation back to our own experience. In leadership, in relationships, in classrooms — this habit can be costly.
Active listening is more than a communication skill; it’s a leadership mindset. It’s about slowing down your own inner dialogue so that you can fully receive what someone else is saying — even when it’s hard, inconvenient, or uncomfortable. True listening requires the discipline to withhold judgment and the humility to accept that someone else’s perspective may change your own.
During my time as a principal in Tennessee, I, Dr. Michael Ford, learned the hard way that listening can either build bridges or burn them. I’ve sat in meetings where the most powerful response I could offer was silence — not because I didn’t have ideas, but because I needed to hear the fullness of what others were carrying. Teachers, students, parents — they all wanted to be heard. Really heard.
There’s a difference between hearing and listening. Hearing is passive. Listening is intentional. Active listening means paying attention not just to words, but to tone, body language, and what’s not being said. It means being present enough to say, “Tell me more,” instead of jumping to conclusions. And it’s in those moments that relationships shift, trust grows, and people feel safe enough to be real.
I’ve worked with leaders who were brilliant strategists but poor listeners. Their ideas were sharp, but their teams felt dismissed, unseen, and disengaged. Over time, that lack of connection eats away at culture. On the other hand, I’ve seen leaders with quieter temperaments transform entire buildings simply because they listened before they led.
Active listening also applies to how we engage with students. In classrooms I’ve observed and supported, the most effective teachers weren’t those with the flashiest lessons. They were the ones who created space for student voice — who asked real questions and let silence be okay. Students thrive when they know their ideas matter. Listening is a form of respect, and respect builds confidence.
When people feel heard, they’re more likely to take ownership, engage in dialogue, and work toward solutions. Whether you’re a leader, teacher, parent, or colleague, that kind of listening takes time. It takes effort. But the payoff is worth it — in loyalty, clarity, and mutual understanding.
Ask yourself: Do I listen to win? Do I listen to fix? Or do I listen to understand? The answer to that question might shape more than just your next conversation. It might shape your leadership. Because people don’t follow titles. They follow trust. And trust is built, not declared.
As Dr. Michael M. Ford, I’ve trained educational leaders across the country in the art of coaching conversations and conflict navigation. Every single time, it comes back to the same truth: people don’t need perfect answers — they need presence. They need someone who’s willing to sit in the discomfort long enough to reach clarity together.
In a world full of noise, listening is radical. It’s disruptive. And it’s necessary. The louder things get — online, in meetings, in our heads — the more valuable a true listener becomes.
So the next time you’re in a conversation, try holding the silence just a moment longer. Try asking one more question. Try hearing the heart behind the words. Because in that space, transformation can begin.
Listening isn’t just a soft skill. It’s a leadership superpower. And it's one the world needs now more than ever.